Is it Tomorrow Yet?
“What would you do if you were stuck in one place and every day was exactly the same, and nothing that you did mattered?”
Phil Conners (Bill Murray in Groundhog Day
Groundhog Day is one of my favorite movies. I love to curl up on the couch and watch Groundhog Day but I never wanted to live it! And many of us feel as though we are starring in a remake of that movie. Every day is the same. I wake up, walk down the hall, and work. Half the time I’m not even sure what day it is.
In the “good old days” before COVID-19, most of us spent more time at work than we did at home. There was more to going to work than being at work.You were most likely out of your home from the time you wake up in the morning until you arrive home again sometime near or after dinnertime. There would be enough time in the evening to have a meal and, if you’re lucky spend an hour or two with the rest of the family before you go to bed to start it all again in the morning.
Why is lock-down, quarantine, so difficult? Overwhelmingly, being locked down is hardly a vacation. You may not be going out to work, but you cook, you clean, you work. On top of everything else, if you have children, you are now a teacher. Just try conducting a meeting while keeping the toddlers entertained. None of us were trained to live our lives in a few hundred or even a few thousand square feet. We may love our significant other and our children, just maybe not so close.
Good grief, do they have to be right on top of me?
“Divorce filings are skyrocketing from quarantine-weary and financially stressed couples, according to top matrimonial attorneys, who are experiencing a 50 percent rise in inquiries from potential clients.”
Emily Smith, in her Page Six post “Divorce rates jumping in corona-quarantined couples“
How do we make it better?
Stop mourning the things you don’t have. Consider this an opportunity to remind yourself why you fell in love with your spouse. Learn to get along with the people we love, to get to know people you used to see for only a couple of hours a day and on weekends.
Remind yourself every day that being with your family is the reason you went to work in the first place and, give yourself a break, it takes time to change everything about the way your life works. Don’t expect that it works from the outset.
So, now that my pep talk is done, what do you miss the most? I asked my son that question a few days ago. His response?
“I miss going to the movies,” he said. “Somehow sitting in front of the TV isn’t the same, even if we make pop corn.”
Most of all, I miss family gatherings. We used to get together with my stepson’s family on a regular basis. There was almost always something to celebrate from birthdays to anniversaries, to just because. Of course, we can’t do that now. And it isn’t just family that I miss. I miss my framily, the friends who have become family.
Every morning, when I awaken to the strains of “I Got You, Babe,” I force myself to get out of bed and go through one more day. But I’m still hoping that someday, I will wake up tomorrow will actually have arrived.