If you greet your significant other with questions like, “How was your day?” or “Is Frank still in rehab?” you’re going to give away the fact that you aren’t interested by the way you receive the answer. If you’re already busy on your phone or watching TV, it’s going to be abundantly clear that you are asking questions you think you should ask and really couldn’t give a crap what they’re going to say. So stop it!
Wake up and take yourself off auto-pilot. You’re in a relationship with this person. You supposedly care about them, so ask questions that show that you care.
“How was your day?” is a question that we all get, not only from a significant other, but from all of the casual acquaintances in your life as well. The next time someone asks you that question, give them a real answer and then watch their eyes glaze over. Don’t do that to someone you love!
Give your lover or spouse the attention they deserve. They can tell, just as you can, when the question is asked “because your should” rather than “because you care.” Instead of asking the automatic questions, ask, “How did your presentation go?” or “What’s the best thing that happened today?” The next step is, of course, to listen to the answer. Then ask questions that show them that you listened.
Here’s the most important thing to remember. Once you’ve asked, really listen to the answer. Unless someone is bleeding or the house is on fire, really look at them and pay attention! I’m not suggesting that you should let the dinner burn; take it off the heat and sit down at the table. Whatever it takes to put you in active attention mode, do it.
Ask a question for which you really want an answer and then show that you care and have an active interest in the answer. The whole idea behind a conversation is that both people are fully engaged. Do your part and they will follow suit.
For more relationship quick tips see the relationship section here at Wild One Forever.
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