Oh, This Chinny Chin Chin! And Other Gripes
I hate it.
I hate my chinny chin chin – all three of them. Most of the time I keep the camera angle up high in order to hide my chin. Rarely do I like profile pictures because not only is there an absence of earlobes but they seem to flow directly into a non-existent jawline.
I might obsess a little about this because I translate a strong jawline to a strong personality – I don’t know why – but my theory hasn’t been disproven either. In any event, I have a stubborn streak and I want my neck and jaw to show it. Instead, I may have to settle for a strong chin.
I cannot say if I’m being vain or an idiot about this. Probably both. Meh. It is what it is but that doesn’t mean I’ll stop fighting for an awesome neck.
Giraffe Kisses and Monster Faces to Get Rid of that Chin
I don’t mind looking a fool if it breaks the ice and gets people to relax and listen. I’ve been on a battle to get rid of my double chin for the longest time and I’ve only been able to find one decent exercise – the giraffe kisses.
If you watch my video, I explain that I’ve been practicing giraffe kisses for nearly two decades. Hubby happens to be 6’4″ tall and I get those giraffe kisses all the time. It hasn’t done anything to “tighten up” my neck.
So then I thought, what kind of facial contortions must I do to feel like my neck is getting a workout? That’s when I sat at my desk and started making faces. The monster face really allows me to feel the stretch like I’m working muscles in my neck.
Jut out your chin and grimace (or smile). As I say in the video, make a face like “Don Corleone gone bad.” Hold it for 10 to 20 seconds and do about 5 to 10 repetitions. You’ll feel your neck.
If you need a laugh…
There’s probably a reason that the younger AND older generation doesn’t understand the Gen-Xers. It’s probably because we inhaled too much Aquanet and our leotards cut the circulation to our heart.
And as cringe-worthy as this might look to you, I laugh at this shit and wan nostalgic for my mullet, cut up oversized sweatshirt, and leg warmers. If I can embrace my weird 70s and 80s childhood, then the stuff I’m doing now seems kind of tame.
How’s that for perspective?
And yes, I did Jazzercise and the Jane Fonda Workout in high school. Ah, memories.
Don’t get me wrong, eventually, nothing short of plastic surgery is going to help the saggy neck, especially as I get older. By then, I’m not going to give a flying flip what my neck looks like but for now, I want it gone.
Herein lies more frustration.
Why are my wrists skinny???
Of all the useless places to lose weight — my wrists?! I get it but I don’t like it.
Consider this: When someone is caught in a snowstorm and out in the elements, they usually get frostbite and potentially lose the outermost exterior appendages. You can live without toes or fingers, or even your nose. This is the body’s way of protecting its core because without the core the body dies.
Now, in the case of losing weight, it makes sense that the body is once again protecting its core and the “protective” fat will be the last to go. Cue in the tears.
This is going to be a long road to getting fit and getting my waistline back.
If you’re keeping track – this is DAY 8 of the 30-day challenge.
Featured image source: Pixabay